Why it hurts

I am
hurt
but not
quite
ready
to tell
you why.
It would
be easy
just
to let
it go,
but I have
been doing
that a lot
lately
and I can feel
myself
floating
to that place
of pleasing
others and not
me. I start
to use
phrases
like,
Its ok,
and I
understand.
At first
I thought I
was hurt because
I am starting
to forget
the last time
we were
connected and
present with
each other.
Then I thought
it was because
I can not
remember
the last time
you told
me I looked
pretty.
But then I realized
as I sat
in bed
watching
tv in
the dark,
It hurts
because I
am letting
this be acceptable.
I am not
a silly little
girl who
needs
attention
beyond
reality. I
am simply
a Woman
who has
worked
hard to be
seen,
and once
in awhile
I would
love that.
That is
why it
hurts.