Already inside Me

I forgot my
Prayer Cushion.
Damn.
I just got done
working out.
The next step
for me
is always mediation.
But I forgot my
Prayer Cushion.
I took a cushion
off the couch
and opened up the sliding
glass door.
This opens to a screened
in porch.
It is rainy and
windy.
So I choose to sit half in
the living room
on the cushion
my long legs stretched
out unto
the porch.
The wind and rain
gently touching my legs.
I sit to mediate.
To find you.
My Father.
The only Father
I have known.
It takes about
15 min.
Tears streaming
down my face.
I found you.
My confessions
start.
How I will be a better
person.
Guide me, use me.
I sit thinking of all
my blessings and Stresses.
The wind is blowing so
loud and the Ocean is
beating so loudly like
a drum.
A huge wind gusts
comes and knocks
me down as I am
in my sitting
position.
My head hits the floor.
It feels like someone slapped
me on the back of my head.
I laugh.
You are already inside
me father and while
you enjoy the thanks
the slap on the head
was just you
saying...
SNAP OUT OF IT!
and I am.
thank you.