Tell me Buddha...

I went to
temple
today
and prayed.
I got my cushion
and sat down.
Something
ended that I
was not ready
to end.
We never have
 a choice.
Change happens.
I sat on my cushion
meditating trying
to find my peaceful
place.
Honestly, feeling
like a Jack ass
for not letting
life happen.
I always
try to control
it, so I do not
get hurt.
Then I get hurt.
I start to pray
to God.
Tell me what
to do?
The loneliness
is more than
I can bare at
times.
I bike
clean
dance
and run.
I keep so
busy I can not
think.
I hop from one
thing to the next.
simply because
if i stop I will think.
The loneliness
will take me.
As I leave One
of the monks is
at the door.
He says to me..
Whatever you
pray for, the
one thing is usually
your destiny.
It will not change.
A poor man
who prays for
money will
always be poor.
this is your path.
So whatever it
is that you think
you want..
you may simply
not get..its your
path and your struggle.
Thanks, I bow and
smile.
Have peace in
your heart I say.
The same to
you he smiles
and walks away.
Shit..I think
to myself,
How did I get
into the loneliness
I will never find
someone to love
me line? I think
to myself.
Putting on my shoes
I scoop up my
cushion and
into my car
I go.
Tell me Buddha...
This is my path.
I guess there
could be worse.
No one ever died
of loneliness..
or have they?